Quick Story!: Volume 1

A quick story will be made every so often unannounced and unplanned... like teenage pregnancy (:

This story is about two very important people.

The red writing is me and the blue writing is a person who wishes to remain unknown.

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Once upon a time there was a girl called Pauline
she liked to pick flowers for her S+E teacher James.
"oh james, i picked some flowers for you" she said.

James the handsome 40-year-old virgin replied

"O Pauline, hopefully one day our relationship will blossom like the flowers you bestoy upon me."

"Oh James, if only it was that easy... no one would ever allow our relationship, its completely wrong. If it was unveiled then you would look like a pedofile and i would look like a slut" *cries*.

"Pauline please...well make this work our love is stronger then anything anyone has ever seen. That time in Canberra I really grew closer to you and learnt more about you. I cannot live without you Paulinee. Forget what people think. Lets run away together for good."

"JAMES! How could you say that? I won't just leave my friends, especially the best person in the world, who I secretly would love to be coz she's so awesome, Courtney. I'm sorry James, I love you and I agree that Canberra was a time to remember in our relationship, what with the zoo magazine you bought and everything, but I can't leave."

"Pauline..you..you really are just leaving now after all weve been through...I...I dont believe you dont love me the way i do. You cant leave because of some awesome friend. This cannot be Goodbye):"

"I'm not leaving you! All i said is that we can't run away together, and we can't bring our relationship out in the open... My peers would tease me... and I saw the way you were hitting on those student teachers the other day in S+E" *glares*

"O Pauline i am sorry about that i admit i was trying to make you jeas...Ok so why dont we do this in secret. Come over to mine and we can do whatever you want."

"I'd LOVE to James, but you set us an assignment for S+E. And i have to do THAT tonight"

"O damn well stuff that hey ill give you full marks anyway even though you wrote swear words on that economics assignment..."

"Just because i wrote 'JR is a dick' on my page doesn't mean i dont love you *smiles*. I meant Jarryd Reeve... actually I didnt... I was just jealous of you and those sexy student teachers"

"O Pauline. I forgive you...lets stop wasting time and makeout here and now"

"Ok James' *pushes him up against the wall and sticks her tounge down his throat*.
Things start to get hot and heavy in the S+E classroom and soon both Pauline and James are lying in each others arms on a group of desks (still fully clothed because pauline isnt a slut).

"O Paulinee...you're soo beautiful and smell like fruit salad" says James. "O yer i had it for recess" replies Pauline. Just then, to their horror Mrs Payne walks in the room...

"omg, Mrs Payne... umm this isnt what it looks like" James said,
"Mrs Payne thank god you came, he was about to rape me" Pauline screamed and struggled against James' arms.
James sat frozen on the desk staring at Pauline hurtfully "JAMES! That's IT you're FIRED!" shouted Mrs Payne in her manly voice. "Pauline honey are you ok?" she asked. Pauline didnt look at James feeling a little ashamed. "Yes" she replied.

Pauline ran into Mrs paynes huge manly arms and hugged her, "Mrs Payne, thank you for coming, i never would have made it through life with a burden like that!" Pauline said scanning Mrs Paynes ugly outfit as usual hating that someone could dress like that and making a mental note that she should tell everyone that Mrs Payne dresses like a retard.
Meanwhile, James sat Crying on his desk. Suddenly, he lashed out at Pauline...and then the unthinkable...he Started pashing mrs payne!
"JAMES! what are you doing?" Mrs Payne said struggling against his grip, "I'm married!" But soon Mrs Payne stopped struggling and did the grossest thing Pauline had ever seen in her life... she ripped of James' shirt and told him that she wanted to take him then and there.
As Mrs Payne and James made out mubbling words of love and lust, Pauline ran out of the room in search of her friends to show them what had happened. Mrs Payne had never felt so rebelious in her life and it felt soo good to be breaking the rules especially when it was with someone so handsome and... ah smart.
"Maddie!!! You'll never guess wat just happened!" Pauline shouted as she tried to run towards her without tripping over. "What Pauline?" Maddie said patiently. "I just saw the grossest thing in te world... and Jam- i mean Mr Ramsay was about to rape me, so Mrs Payne walked in and then he started kissing Mrs Payne and then Mrs Payne said that she wanted to take him then and there... I'm scarred for life."
Maddie was shocked and then started giggling. "Lets tell the others" she said. So Maddie and Pauline ran together and told all their friends. Soon, everyone was walking over to the classroom where James and Mrs Payne were making out.

"OH MY GOD" Carina said shocked, "thank god this isnt a primary school!"
However Christina just stood there and pondered. "Who do you thinks hotter. Dean or Taylor?" she said oblivious to the goings on in the classroom.
"CHRISTINA, you're so retarded sometimes!" Courtney said annoyed, "They're both so ugly that they should go die!" Christina ran off to the bathroom in tears and half of the group followed her giving Courtney the evil eye for upsetting her.
Carina slapped Courtney "Not both of them only dean" she said and walked off. Everyone soon forgot about James and Mrs Payne. A year later....
Mrs Payne and James were married after James stopped hitting on the student teachers and Mrs Payne broke the news to her husband.
Her husband didn't care and turns out he was gay and thought Mrs Payne was a man all along.
And it turns out Pauline never like James in the first place because she thought that he was a douche, but wanted some excitement in her life.
She gave him flowers because they were really poison flowers.
And it turns out James thought that she was a new student teacher called Pauline and he never meant for that to happen with his student because he was a very 'holy' man.
And Christina ended up getting over both Dean and Taylor and got into a relationship with a toaster...
And Abbey* well she still remained awesome.
Because she could never ever be anything less
And Courtney also remained awesome.
THE END.

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*This name has been changed because the person wished to remain unknown.

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Just before you go around spreading rumours and stuff, this story was completely fictional and I don't mean to offend anyone XD

Mrs Payne and Mr Ramsay... you are very special people? LOL

Hope you guys enjoyed the story.

Christina's annoying time will be coming soon.

Annoying Jane: Part 2

XD okay, well this is my story about Jane that someone made up last term in RE.

Enjoy (:

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There was once a girl named Jane who loved to eat whole cows for breakfast everyday.

There was only one person who appreciated her greediness, and that person was named Josh Cathcart.

Josh was small with blonde hair and blue eyes.

He watched her everyday eating the whole cows, and then she watched him while he striped.

She started to stalk him, but he liked it.

They started stalking each other which made them run around in circles.

Since they both can’t balance properly, they tripped over each other and started laughing.

They have been together ever since and make out constantly…

Until Jane mistook him for a cow that she was going to eat for breakfast.

Now Jane has turned cannibal because she liked the taste so much.

THE END

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OMG wow, you enjoyed BOTH my stories?

ily forever (:

hehe well yeh, next person I'll be annoying is... Drumroll please...

CHRISTINA PETERS XD haha

Stay tuned XD hehe

Annoying Maddie: Part 2

OK. This story kinda begins weirdly, but give me some credit, I made it up in about 2 minute in business beginnings last semester XD

Tell me if you like (:

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But in the mean time Minnie and Mickey mouse pranced through the meadow and pashed many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many times.

Minnie then proceeded to change her name to Madalyn (nicknamed Maddie) and Mickey proceeded to change his name to Sean.

They lived happily ever after and went to school at Corpus Christi College together.

They tried to hide their love but it was finally unveiled.

They meet every night in the rosemary bush in Maddie’s front garden.

THE END

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You liked it? Wow thanks, you're so nice XD

I'll have Annoying Jane: Part 2 up in a few minutes as well.

I wasn't going to make a 'Part 2' for Jane, but then I found the story that someone made up about her last term in RE (:

Hehe

Annoying Maddie: Part 1

Ok, the day has arrived... about 6 days early...

But today it's Maddie's turn to be annoyed (:

Since Maddie has an undying love for Sean I thought this would be appropriate.

This is a typical convo between Maddie and Sean...

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SEAN THE STUD! says (5:42 PM):
hi maddie
Maddie the nerd! says (5:43 PM):
...what do you want retard
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:43 PM):
i was just wondering if you finished your maths homework yet
Maddie the nerd! says (5:43 PM):
...no duh i finished it AGES ago.
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:43 PM):
nerd
Maddie the nerd! says (5:44 PM):
=.= im not a nerd.
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:44 PM):
yeh you are
Maddie the nerd! says (5:44 PM):
well youre a retard
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:44 PM):
no im not, youre a retard
Maddie the nerd! says (5:44 PM):
... you're just stupid.
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:44 PM):
no im not. im a stud
Maddie the nerd! says (5:45 PM):
... and what does THAT mean.
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:45 PM):
all you need to know is that im awesome
and no, i dont care if you check me out in maths... im just so awesome that its understandable
Maddie the nerd! says (5:46 PM):
...youre so up yourself. and you? awesome?
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:46 PM):
why are you laughing? im more awesome than you
Maddie the nerd! says (5:46 PM):
if youre awesome then im a pregnant goldfish
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:47 PM):
hehe well you have been looking awfully fat lately
Maddie the nerd! says (5:47 PM):
*gasp* you idiot.
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:47 PM):
wat? im just hilarious which just adds to my awesomeness
Maddie the nerd! says (5:47 PM):
you're about as funny as a brick wall or jan, according to caroline
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:47 PM):
well then... i think a brick wall and jan are both hilarious although im slightly more funny
Maddie the nerd! says (5:48 PM):
well. im sure jan thanks you but she probs wouldnt appreciate the fact that A RETARD thinks shes funny
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:48 PM):
well... if im a retard then im one HOT retard
you dont find many guys a good looking as me these days
Maddie the nerd! says (5:48 PM):
...ew. no one would date you if youre the last guy on earth
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:49 PM):
o really?
Maddie the nerd! says (5:49 PM):
really.
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:49 PM):
im sure you would date me, wouldn't you maddie...
Maddie the nerd! says (5:49 PM):
...omg. ew. no.
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:49 PM):
all this meaness is just hiding your true feelings
Maddie the nerd! says (5:49 PM):
never.
BLEUGHHHHH NO
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:50 PM):
haha well... before you can say anything... im rejecting you first
Maddie the nerd! says (5:50 PM):
... you cant reject me
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:50 PM):
why not
Maddie the nerd! says (5:50 PM):
i never asked you out you IDIOT
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:50 PM):
well... i never asked you out either.. so you cant reject me
Maddie the nerd! says (5:51 PM):
... you are the STUPIDEST person i have ever met in my ENTIRE life.
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:51 PM):
o really? well then how come im in the top maths class
Maddie the nerd! says (5:51 PM):
meh you got lucky
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:51 PM):
really, well then i must get lucky a lot coz im awesome in every single way
YOU’RE SPEECHLESS... i tend to have that affect on women...
Maddie the nerd! says (5:52 PM):
... no im not, im just so shocked
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:52 PM):
ok then... youre shocked by my awesomeness
Maddie the nerd! says (5:53 PM):
i didnt know it was possible... but... YOU ARE EVEN MORE OF A RETARD THAN I THOUGHT
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:53 PM):
o really, well if thats how you feel then why am i even talking to you?!!?!?!
Maddie the nerd! says (5:53 PM):
hey i dunno you talked to me
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:53 PM):
dont expect any more convos with me
Maddie the nerd! says (5:54 PM):
oh i wont
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:54 PM):
GOODBYE
Maddie the nerd! says (5:54 PM):
JUST LEAVE ALREADY
SEAN THE STUD! says (5:54 PM):
wait.. no i mean... BADBYE

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Thanks to co-writter, co-producer and advisor Jan for your unending awesomeness (:

This post was veeeeerrrry long... I'm very sorry (:

But during the week sometime I'll be posting 'Annoying Maddie: Part 2'

If you want some input into how it's done then email me or talk to me on MSN.

Sorry Maddie if I offended you in anyway... but you just have to tell everyone how you feel before something like tis happens (:

bye bye (:

P.S. read Annoying Jane (:

Annoying Jane: Part 1

Today we have a job...

This job is to annoy Jane Holford...

She is a very annoying person herself...

This is why I am going to list the people she is in love with...

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1) Harry

2) Canada [You act like you hate his accent but really you love it]

3) Leon

4) Jonathan

5) Jordan J

6) Mr R

7) Josh/Astronaught Boy

8) Her left foot... [Don't know why]

9) A sharp knife... [nooooo not for what you're thinking... its for cutting up vegetables...]

10) Last but not least... FELICITY (:

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That is who Jane is in love with at the moment (:

Thanks for reading and remember to tell all of your friends.

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Coming up next week: Maddie...

Stick around XD

Next week I will reveal the target for two weeks time.

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Till then... GOODBYE (: